Decided to start jotting down what I do everyday. How my day went etc.
Hopefully this'll keep me sane at the very least cuz i totally feel like i've lost my mind.
I told myself countless times it'll get better overtime. People ard me say that too.
What bullshit.
I know taking pills arent gonna kill me unless i manage to get my hands on sleeping pills.
But i am scared.
Anyway.
Im back to fucking up everything in my life once more. I would call myself a class A whore but tht seems like such an understatement.
Drank last night.
Thought of you the entire time.
He showered me with endless compliments.
Tht felt rly nice. Made me a little happier.
When he kissed me I missed you.
I felt nothing but gross.
Tried to sleep it off after he left but woke up realising i ate before sleeping and just had to force it out or id be ugly.
Drinking again later on.
Hopefully the him tonight would be a little more similar to you.
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